What Teens Could Really be Saying on TikTok

For many adults, TikTok is just another social media platform full of dances, memes, funny videos, and viral challenges. But for millions of teenagers, it’s much more than entertainment. It’s a lifeline, a diary, and, in some cases, a coded place to say, “I’m not okay.” 

What may look like a random statement or inside joke to parents can actually be a subtle distress signal. Take, for example, the phrases: 

  • “I ate pasta last night” 
  • “I finished my shampoo and conditioner at the same time” 

To the untrained eye, these phrases look silly or irrelevant. But within certain corners of TikTok, they’ve been adopted as coded messages that indicate depression, hopelessness, or suicidal thoughts. 

This is part of a growing trend where young people turn to social platforms not just to connect but also to signal emotional struggles in ways that feel safer, less direct, and more “acceptable” than outright confessions. 

Overview 

This blog explores how teens use coded language trends on TikTok and other digital platforms to express distress, often in ways that may not be obvious to parents or educators. Some phrases are playful or casual, while others can signal emotional struggles when repeated or paired with concerning behavior. Use this page as a reference hub to understand these signals, spot patterns, and access practical resources to support young people. 

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Teenagers today live in a digital-first world. When they feel distressed, social media often feels like a more natural space to open up than speaking face-to-face with an adult. But instead of posting “I’m depressed” or “I want to hurt myself”—which could bring judgment, misunderstanding, or even trigger content removal—teens use coded words and trends. 

While these phrases don’t always signal serious distress, but when they appear repeatedly, alongside concerning behavior, or in combination with other trends, they can indicate an underlying struggle. Adults should watch patterns and overall behavior rather than isolated posts. 

There are three main reasons they do this: 

    1. Protection through humor or randomness – “I ate pasta last night” seems playful, not alarming. It softens the heaviness of what the teen is truly feeling. 
    2. Connection through shared culture – Those “in the know” (often peers) recognize the meaning, while outsiders may miss it. This creates a sense of belonging and support. 
    3. Avoidance of moderation or parental concern – Platforms often block or limit content around self-harm. By using euphemisms, young people can still express their feelings and reach their peers without being flagged.

Key takeaway: Look for patterns, not one-off uses. Single posts may just be playful or casual. 

Here are some of the common coded messages and phrases circulating online: 

      • “I ate pasta last night” – Originally linked to a poem listing reasons to stay alive, this phrase became shorthand for someone saying they are in emotional pain but not able to say it outright.
      • “I finished my shampoo and conditioner at the same time” – Represents hopelessness or suicidal ideation. The imagery of two products ending together at once became a symbolic metaphor for life ending.
      • Other Phrases from the “Don’t Kill Yourself Today” Poem – Lines like “My Netflix subscription ran out” or “I just told someone my favorite pasta recipe” are poetic euphemisms for suicidal thoughts. These spread on TikTok and Wattpad communities.
      • “Menty B” (Mental Breakdown) – A slang abbreviation for “mental breakdown.” It normalizes discussing stress or emotional collapse, but frequent use may mask deeper struggles.
      • Algospeak – To avoid moderation filters, teens use modified words. This lets them share sensitive content without censorship but also creates a barrier for adults unfamiliar with the language. For example: 
        • “Unalive” = suicide 
        • “Sewer slide” = suicide (phonetic play) 
        • “Seggs” = sex 
        • “SA” = sexual assault
      • “Intrusive Thoughts” Trend – Often used as a lighthearted joke (“my intrusive thought told me to yeet my phone off the balcony”), but it also signals genuine anxiety, OCD, or dark thought patterns when used repeatedly. 

Everyday Phrases with Hidden Meanings

Beyond TikTok, kids have long used everyday language to express feelings. While these phrases don’t always indicate distress, they can carry hidden meaning when used frequently, in combination with other concerning behavior, or in particular contexts. 

      • “I’m tired” – sometimes signals emotional exhaustion or hopelessness. 
      • “I don’t feel well” – may reflect anxiety, depression, or other stress. 
      • “I want to go home” – could indicate a desire for safety or, in rare cases, suicidal ideation. 
      • “I’m bored” – can occasionally mask feelings of emptiness or intrusive thoughts. 
      • Remember: The focus should be on patterns and context, not assuming hidden meaning from a single statement. 

Why Parents and Educators Miss the Signs 

To adults, many of these phrases seem like nonsense, memes, or slang. Without cultural context, it’s easy to dismiss them. But for young people, these words carry shared meaning and emotional weight. 

The rapid pace of TikTok trends also makes it difficult for parents, teachers, and even counselors to keep up. A phrase that’s a joke one week can morph into a serious signal the next. 

This creates a gap: 

      • Kids feel like they’re speaking loud and clear. 
      • Adults don’t recognize the language at all. 

If you’re a parent, educator, or mentor, here’s what you can do: 

      1. Stay curious, not judgmental. 
        If you see a phrase you don’t understand, ask gently: “Hey, I saw you post about pasta – what does that mean for you?” 
      2. Do your homework. 
        Learn the latest slang and trends. Even spending 15 minutes a week browsing TikTok can help you understand the culture. 
      3. Look for patterns, not one-offs. 
        A single post might not be alarming. But repeated references to coded distress, dark humor, or algospeak should be taken seriously. 
      4. Encourage open conversations. 
        Make it clear that mental health struggles are not shameful, and kids can come to you without fear of punishment. 
      5. Offer support, not surveillance. 
        Teens retreat when they feel spied on. Focus on building trust rather than monitoring every post. 
      6. Know when to act. 
        If you suspect immediate danger, contact a professional or crisis hotline. 

The Bigger Picture: Digital Signals of Distress 

TikTok distress codes remind us that kids are often reaching out; they’re just not doing it in ways adults expect. Behind a playful video or random phrase might be a serious emotional struggle. 

For parents, this means taking a step back from literal interpretations and looking at patterns, tone, and consistency. A single phrase may be harmless, but repeated expressions combined with mood or behavior changes could signal that a child is struggling. 

For schools and teachers, the challenge is even greater. With dozens, or even hundreds of students to support, it’s not always possible to notice subtle signals in real time. Educators want to listen, but the scale of digital communication can make it difficult. This is where supportive tools and monitoring platforms, such as digital safeguarding solutions, can play an important role. Helping schools’ flag at-risk students and ensure no signs of distress are overlooked. 

By learning to decode this language, parents and educators together can bridge the gap between online expression and offline support. It’s about listening differently, paying attention to context, and meeting young people where they are. 

Beyond TikTok: How Distress Codes Spread Across Platforms 

These codes and phrases are not limited to TikTok. They often appear across Instagram, Snapchat, Discord, YouTube, X, and private messaging. Again, frequency, repetition, and surrounding behavior are the best indicators of whether a post or trend is concerning. Adults should adopt a holistic, pattern-based approach rather than reacting to isolated posts. Instagram & Reels – Phrases and memes frequently reappear in captions, stories, and hashtag communities. 

      • Snapchat – Teens may use emojis, captions, or streak updates to communicate hidden distress. 
      • Discord & Gaming Chats – Slang like unalive or sewer slide circulates widely in server conversations. 
      • YouTube Shorts – Viral sounds and coded phrases often resurface here from TikTok. 
      • X (formerly Twitter) – Users adapt phrases into tweets or hashtags, keeping the coded messages alive. 
      • Private Messaging Apps – WhatsApp, iMessage, and Messenger group chats often carry the same coded slang in more private, peer-to-peer ways. 

The takeaway: These signals aren’t limited to TikTok. Young people carry them across digital spaces, meaning adults who only monitor or engage with one platform may miss critical signs of distress. 

Reading Between the Posts: Understanding Teens’ Hidden Digital Language 

If this topic resonates with you, explore these follow-up guides to dive deeper and better understand the digital signals teens are sending. Remember, no single post or phrase always indicates distress—look for patterns, repeated behavior, and context to get a holistic view of your teen’s wellbeing. 

      • The Parent’s Guide to TikTok Slang: What Your Kids Might Really Be Saying
        A quick-reference glossary of common distress codes and their potential meanings, with tips on spotting patterns. 
      • How to Talk to Your Teen About Mental Health Without Scaring Them Away
        Practical conversation strategies to build trust and encourage ongoing communication. 
      • Decoding Emojis: What Online Symbols Can Tell You About Your Child’s Mood
        Explore how repeated use of emojis like đŸ„ș👉👈, đŸ§â€â™€ïž, and 💀 may indicate emotions or struggles in context. 
      • The Rise of Algospeak: How Teens Outsmart Algorithms to Talk About Serious Issues
        Understand how euphemisms like “unalive” or “sewer slide” appear across platforms and what to watch for in combination with other signals. 
      • Digital Wellbeing: How Schools and Parents Can Partner to Support Students Online
        Strategies for creating safe, supportive digital environments, emphasizing consistent observation of patterns rather than isolated posts. 

Tip: Use these resources to observe trends over time and combine them with what you know about your teen’s offline behavior for a complete picture. 

When a Trend Is Really a Cry for Help 

A teen saying “I ate pasta last night” may not be talking about dinner. They may be telling the world they’re struggling. As adults, we need to tune in, not just to the words, but to the meanings beneath them. 

For parents, that means noticing patterns, changes in tone, and repeated phrases that might point to something deeper. For schools, the challenge is even greater. With so many students and so much digital communication, it’s nearly impossible for teachers to catch every subtle signal of distress. That’s why schools increasingly turn to tools like onGuard, which can help identify concerning patterns early and ensure that no student’s plea for help goes unheard. 

With curiosity, empathy, and awareness, supported by the right tools, we can notice these signals; start conversations, and connect kids with the help they truly need. 

Because sometimes, what looks like a trend is actually a quiet plea for help. 

Understanding teen slang and online signals is just the first step, knowing how to respond safely and effectively is the next. Our Parent & Educator Guide to Online Safety provides practical tools, examples, and conversation starters to help you: 

      • Decode hidden language, slang, and emojis teens use online. 
      • Recognize patterns of distress without overreacting to isolated posts. 
      • Start judgment-free conversations that build trust and connection. 
      • Encourage healthy digital habits at home and in the classroom. 
      • Track trends, behaviors, and emotional signals over time. 

This guide is designed to support both parents and educators, bridging the gap between online expression and real-world support. Every small, compassionate conversation helps children feel safer, seen, and supported. 

[Download the Guide Here] 

Use this resource to turn awareness into action; helping teens navigate their digital world with guidance, empathy, and understanding.Â